I met my Master four months ago while attending the Folsom St. Fair in San Francisco. I had always been attracted to leather. The look of it. The feel off it. The smell of it. But never considered a Leather lifestyle as an alternative gay lifestyle. Little did I know, while watching men getting spanked at the spanking booth, that I would soon be the one getting plenty of spanking.I felt eyes on me as I was walking through the crowd to leave, and turned my head. There across a sea of faces a very handsome man was looking at me as we both walked in opposite directions. He disappeared into the crowd, never to be seen again, or so I thought.
We met hours later at a "salt & pepper"l bar in the Castro. We talked for a bit. He put His hands firmly around my throat and asked, "What's the first thing that comes to your mind?" My immediate response was "trust". I thought perhaps He was testing me to see if I was frightened by Him or not. Turned out He was just sizing my neck for the locked collar I wear proudly today.
The first hint of a M/s relationship came that first night when we went for dinner. We sipped lemonade from each other's glass through crisscrossed straws between bites of food. Sir explained to me that He was a whole person and that He saw me as whole person. That He was not just a Master, but a Master, Daddy, Friend and Lover. This sounded great to me. I'm a holistic kind of guy and could relate to that. The word Master and it's relevance didn't register in my mind at the time. Sure I had heard of Leather men being Masters and slaves but had no idea of what that really meant. (Although I had been in a long term relationship with a man from the Middle East and serve in the role of a "Middle Eastern housewife" - a role which is not unlike that of a slave.)
The rest of the evening was wonderfully spent dancing and hot spank love making at my place. We got to my apartment, went straight to the bedroom. He immediately sat down on the bed, grabbed me and threw me across his knee and gave me my first real spanking. Wonderful!! He then release me and ordered me to take His boots off. The rest of it I'11 leave to your imagination.
He got up the next morning, I gave Him my number and address (He did not give me His) and He drove home to Los Angeles. Yes, He was from out of town. I had been doing a lot of self-realization work the last year or so and decided I really wanted to be in another relationship. I had had a couple of near misses during that period and given up on finding a suitable mate. So when I found out that Master was from out of town, I thought, "Oh well it was fun while it lasted." I went about my day savoring the experience from the night before and had just finished eating dinner when the phone rang. It was Master calling from Los Angeles. He had arrive in L.A. just an hour before and had just finished dinner. I knew then we were on the same page. We talked for hours. Master, filling me in on His lifestyle and where He was coming from, began my formal training by taking total control and thus our 24/7 M/s relationship had begun. It's been that way ever since.
For some reason I have always been generally attracted to men of the opposite race. I have always considered myself to be a human being first and foremost. Then comes gender, color and sexual orientation. But in the '"real world", I'm very much aware of how my being Black affects every aspect of my life. From being helped in a department store, to being served in a gay bar. So when this Master/slave relationship was first purposed, I really had no thoughts or concerns about being a slave to a White Master. In a nutshell I live to serve and please my Man, regardless.
The first incident that brought the "race" thing into focus happened a few months into training. While on the phone casually talking, Master referred to me as "niggah" Not Nigger. In all fairness to my Master, I must point out that He is very much into Black Urban Culture and has the utmost respect for the Black race and all people of color. This was quite a surprise. Actually two surprises. The first was Him calling me "niggah", and the second surprise was that I was not offended by it. I have heard many times, while riding the bus through town, young Black urban kids calling each other "niggah". This has always offended me, as I thought the calling of each either by this name was somehow self-degrading. And it puzzled me why, when Master called me this, it did not offend me.
After pondering this for awhile, I finally requested to talk to my Master about it. I grew up in a very middle class military environment and had no real experience with Black urban culture. It took a White man to educate me on a different facet of my own culture. The word "niggah" is used in an affectionate way amongst many urban African Americans. It was and is one of Master's ways of being affectionate with me. I realized that somehow in the deep bond that we share that this was the reason that it didn't offend me. However, I'm very sensitive to the feelings of others, and I can see how very easily this could be offensive to others, regardless of their ethnicity. Some African Americans would find it offensive for a white man to use this term with another Black person, and some Caucasians would perhaps "get off' on it in some racist way. So Master is very mindful of relating to me in this way in public.
There are probably some White men who like Black men that are into a type of dominance that includes a feeling of being superior over someone who is inferior. I feel this sometimes when my Master introduces me to another White Master. When Master calls me boy, T hear boi (endearment). When another Master calls me boy, I hear boy (inferiority). All I know is that my Master loves and respects me for who lam. A loving, self-respecting, intelligent human being, born to serve. We call it "affectionate leather".
So, what does it mean to be M/D/F&L, s/b/f&1? Simply put, it means that we, Master & slave, are all of these things. And recognizing that we are, is what binds us together in an intensely spiritual monogamous relationship. It was Spirit who bought us together and Spirit who is truly both our Master.
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